"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!", Chris once more said while standing on the docks of the island, recapping the previous episode to start off this new one, "It was an EPIC ski race for our eleven campers! Not only that, but a very backstabby race! Amy decided it was a good idea to pretend to be Samey in-order to shatter Mike's heart to pieces, while Scott seemed to be framing Ella for stealing things belonging to everyone. In the end, Amy used this to frame Dawn and Jasmine as helping Samey to try and get them voted off over herself! In the end though, this backfired when Samey pretended to be Amy to get Amy eliminated as if she were Samey! Confusing, I know. Oh, and yes, this means that the Maggots did actually lose for once. By complete and total luck too. Hahaha. As for the others? Well, Sugar devoured an entire Raccoon, Ella continued to annoy me with her singing, and most of the others didn't really do much of anything of worth at all except maybe, well, yeah.", and then Chris was shown physically, finishing the recap, "So, who will be sent home in the Hurl of Shame this week? Who WON'T be sent home on the Hurl of Shame this week? What evil torture will all of them have to face? Find out, TONIGHT, on TOTAL, DRAMA, REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!", and with those words the intro sequence began. After the intro sequence, there was then a sudden commercial break;
*This commercial turns out to be yet another Sonic PSA*
Sonic - *Is standing next to the treetopus from the fourth episode* "Kids, it's time you learned about animal abuse! That's right, animal abuse! It's the most vile act a human being or a mobian could possibly do! Ever! Right up there with murder! That's right, murder! What this Treetopus here went through was downright torture! A girl as big as a whale almost crushed his poor tentacles to near death! And did that whale girl say sorry? NO! Of course not! Ain't that just EVIL?! Yes, it is! Don't say it's not, IT IS! It's just down right NO GOOD. Animal Abusers are right up there with Pedophiles! They need to be lined up and flogged publically if you ask me! But in the end, there's not much we can do. Sadly. All we can do, is send donations to this Teetopus' family to help with the medical funds." *A phone number appears on the bottom of the screen*
Following that commercial was when finally, the actual episode officially began. This episode began with, of course, the remaining 10 competitors. Though not all of them together, instead, the group given focus was Cameron and Mike, waiting just outside of the bathroom. It was very clear from their body language, that they were desperately waiting to finally be able to use the bathroom. It did not take very long at all for Cameron to soon be knocking on the door;
"Um, hello?", Cameron asked as he knocked on the door, "Is it our turn yet?", of course, he was saying that because some of the girls were inside of the bathroom, essentially taking their sweet time inside of it. The girls shown to be in the bathroom were Samey who was putting a blueberry on her cheek to mimic her sister's beauty mark, Sugar who was fixing her hair, and Ella who was humming and seemingly cleaning her dress a bit, of course it was Sugar who replied to Cameron's plea;
"Oh keep your panties on!", she said, looking at the door as she walked up to Ella and Samey, and then turned her attention to them, laughing at Ella who was fixing her hair up, "Nice hair", she sarcastically replied with to Ella, "Looks like that Princess Leea or whatever her name is chick lost a scissor fight with a baby piglet!"
"Oh thank you!", Ella replied, not taking it as insult at all, "I do my best to keep my hair looking like the princesses of Disney!"
"Whatever", was all Sugar replied with after a brief pause, and then she just bluntly took from a bag she had on the bathroom counter a can of hairspray. She then began spraying her with the spray which of course made Samey and Ella soon enough begin coughing as the spray filled the room, Sugar then spent quite a good bit of time fixing her hair up with other hair supplies before finally finishing it, giggling a bit, and turning her attention back to the other two, "Now this is how you do hair!"
"Oh it looks wonderful!", Ella said, making Sugar not happy at all, "What do you think Amy?"
"Yeah", Samey was just finishing coughing, "Good style, I guess."
"Oh I don't need y'all two's insults!", Sugar replied with angrily, "I didn't even ask for your dang opinions anyway!", and then she just bluntly walked out of the bathroom building, leaving Samey and Ella just a bit surprised inside of said room/building. Focus then immediately cut to the boys of the Rats team, as in Scott and Topher. Since there were only two of them, they were both fully awake and dressed, and also standing in the main room of their cabin, and of course this meant they were having a nice little conversation with eachother;
"So", Topher said to Scott, "I think our team is doing pretty well so far."
"You do?", Scott replied with, "But we're losing almost every time."
"Yeah", Topher replied, "But we have the host's favourite on the team!"
"And who would that be?"
"It would be the person your looking at!", Topher proudly answered with, "After Sierra gave up on being a Chris fan, I took over all of her Chris related fan clubs. But I was the Vice President of every single one of them before that anyway so, yeah. The point is, no way would Chris ever let the President of his fan club just leave the show before the merge!"
"Yeah", Scott was now coming up with a scheme already, "No way would he let that ever happen..."
"Yeah!", Topher answered with, "But anyway, I really have to say this though, what do you think I can do with my hair? I want it to look as good as possible for every second I'm on the screen. If they DO decide to replace Chris or if Veronica quits her job, I wanna make sure the person that gets the position is me so I gotta look my best, ya know?"
"Yeah", Scott replied with, nodding his head, "I get what you mean", of course he didn't really mean this at all, "As for your hair, I think it's fine just the way it is. Either that or perhaps you should try to make it look a bit more like Chris' hair does, ya know, incase."
"Hmmm", Topher then pondered that thought, "Ya know, I didn't think about that before, and I think that'd be a great idea so, maybe I should try that!"
"Yeah", Scott then smirked a bit as he finished this conversation up, "Maybe you should."
"I'm gonna go to the washroom right now!", and Topher then hurried right out of the washroom to follow through on Scott's advice. Of course, he would probably be waiting alongside Mike and Cameron too if the girls were not finished up in there yet. After a few seconds of Topher being out of the cabin, Scott continued to smirk, before then snickering.
"Piece of cake.", was all Scott said once Topher was outside.
Scott - "My plan is coming easier than I thought it was gonna be! You see? I got smarts!"
Following that, focus went to another set of campers that were still in the competition. This set, was Jasmine and Shawn. They were in the woods, but Shawn was simply in the background doing mostly unseen actions while Jasmine was busy foraging for food. Of course, Shawn was occassionally observing Jasmine, possibly trying to see if she was a zombie, but there were other possibilities aswell.
Shawn - "Well, I don't have any proof she's not a zombie yet, and so far she has been pretty awesome! So....yeah....pretty sure she's unlikely to be a zombie!"
Following that confessional, focus went back to Jasmine, foraging for food once more as Samey walked up to the scene too. Of course, it did not take Jasmine very long at all to see Samey, who still had a berry on her face to make sure she could indeed pose as Amy properly.
"Woah Amy", Jasmine then playfully teased with, "You had a change of heart and actually want to be nice now?"
"I'm not Amy", Samey replied with, "I'm Sammy, heheh."
"Oh I know", Jasmine replied with, "I'm just pullin' ya leg, ya know."
"Oh, heheh, yeah, I know."
"So, how's it like pretending to be your sister?"
"Well, it's alright.....I'm just, not sure if I can really pull it off for that long."
"Nonsense", Jasmine assured Samey, "Just be the opposite of yourself and you'll be fine! Trust me."
"Yeah, I think I can do that", Samey replied with, "Thanks for helping me."
"No problem", Jasmine responded, "That's what friends are for, right?"
"But then again, Amy doesn't have any real friends."
"Oops", Samey answered, "Sorry, I forgot.", and then the two girls enjoyed a friendly laugh with eachother after that, which of course meant Jasmine did indeed snort a bit aswell. "So, anyway, you don't mind if I join you foraging again, do you?"
"I didn't think you'd want to forage with me, Amy."
"Oh yeah, foraging, ew, no, why would I want to do that?"
"Haha, yeah I think you'll get the hang of it down good", Jasmine replied, and then Samey smiled in response as they once more continued their usual round of foraging for food in the woods. As they spent the rest of a good amount of time foraging for food, with Shawn having been gone from the background for some time when Samey arrived, focus then went over to Dawn who was also in the forest. More specifically, she was sitting on a log and in a meditating position. In did not take much longer after that for the Dorahts to show up by her side of course, walking to her from nearby bushes. They simple rested at the sides of her log, not really doing much of anything at all. It was after a few seconds of this nothing happening that Shawn walked up to her with a curious look to his face. He had some foraged food in a bag he was carrying, but he still asked Dawn a simple question:
"Um.....why are sitting in the middle of the woods doing nothing?"
"What?", Dawn then exited her meditating and realized Shawn was there, "Oh, hello Shawn. I wasn't doing nothing, I was meditating."
"Because", Dawn then explained, "It's how I channel the essence of mother earth and become one with nature."
"Oh.....well, um. Cool."
"I know you think I'm at high risk for a zombie attack", Dawn then bluntly said to him, "I can assure you though that it is unlikely to happen."
"Well, if you say so", and then there was yet another moment of silence. After some whistling, Shawn then walked away and left Dawn alone to meditate and spend time with the two Dorahts resting next to her. It was some time after that when Chris' voice finally sounded on the intercom, with the message that all of the remaining contestants were waiting for:
"Attention campers!", Chris announced, "It's time for the day's challenge! All of you might wanna report immediately to the auditorium, or the stage, or the whatever you wanna call it, right now! Because, well, that's where the day's challenge is gonna start! So......yeah. If you don't get over there fast enough I may make the challenge even MORE humiliating!", and it was after he said that, of course, everyone began heading over there. Once there, they were all seated in the bleachers depending on which team they were on, but Chris himself was not there yet. As such, time was spent on the contestants for a bit instead. Samey noticed her blueberry was slipping and as such she pushed it back up to look like it was the beauty mark again, Mike was looking at who he thought was Amy with a curious and nervous expression, Cameron was sitting around nervous, likely looking desperately to see if Sierra was anywhere near, Topher was looking in a handheld mirror to make sure he looked as good as he possibly could, Scott was just looking around likely thinking up a scheme, and ultimately it was Jasmine who popped the question:
"Um, where's Chris?"
"I thought you'd never ask!", and it was with those words that Chris made his entrance. He didn't just walk onto the stage though, rather he made his entrance using a jetpack instead. He also didn't wear his usual clothes either, he now had something of a white ponytail wig on, wore a black tuxedo outfit, and even had small glasses on too. He even had black dress shoes aswell. Clearly, this challenge was going to have something theme related with his new outfit. "Greetings Campers, and welcome to the auditorium, or the stage, or the Amphitheater, whatever you wanna call it! Chef and the Interns are still busy repairing the Mess Hall. Anyway, this place is where the day's challenge is going to begin!"
"Um", Scott then questioned, "What's with the outfit?"
"That's what the challenge is going to explain!", Chris promptly answered with, "This challenge is going to be Total Drama's first ever MODELING CONTEST!", and then most of the guys groaned, and most of the girls except Jasmine all squealed happily, "That's right, modeling contest! We were going to do one for season one during the Final Five, but we had........budget problems."
*Archive footage from during season one. Veronica is shown relaxing in a hot tub made of pure gold and diamonds, sipping out of a Champagne glass while being fed grapes by her family butler Higgins. She has plenty of other objects surrounding her, and even entire paintings dedicated completely and only to her. She is then approached by one of the other producers, one who has a feminine voice*
Producer - "Um, Veronica, it seems the show's budget has gone down extremely, but it's time for our most expensive challenge we planned for. What happened to the one million dollars we gave you?"
Veronica - "Look around this place and you'll find out." *laughs and sips her champagne* "And remember, Mommy and Daddy would not like to hear that I was fired!"
"Anyway", Chris then continued, "Veronica's having a meeting with the other producers now so it looks like for the time being, I'm the only one hosting this episode!", and in response to that everyone, both girls and boys, groaned, but that annoyed Chris, "Hey! Quit with the groaning! Today's challenge has to start now! Now, originally I was going to have you do a challenge involving finding an animal in the woods to use, dress it up, and then present it to me and a panel of two other judges. Thing is, PETA and the EPA are both on my ass about a certain Season Three challenge among other challenges involving animals, so I have no choice but to change it to something else. As such", he then clapped his hands and three helicopters immediately arrived. The helicopters all had three boxes being carried by ropes beneath them. Of course, once over the stage these crates were immediately dropped onto the stage, not a single one of them even almost hitting Chris and all of them landing perfectly in a row together.
"Okay", Jasmine then commented, "The way those boxes landed was a bit TOO perfectly."
"It's Chris!", Topher then explained to her and everyone, "Everything he does has to be one hundred percent perfect, right Chris?"
"You got that right, Topher!", Chris answered right back with, "And speaking of perfect, it's time for today's challenge which I thought up all by myself! Now, here's the deal. In each of these crates is either a former contestant, or a prominent person from the world we were able to use the budget to get on. All of them are female though, since this is a modeling challenge after all."
"Men can be models too", Jasmine then pointed out, "It's not JUST women who do it."
"Specifics, specifics, it doesn't matter!", Chris replied with, offending Jasmine a bit, "We already got these three girls here! Now, since there's only three teams, that means one of these girls will end up being catapulted back to where they came from anyway, so you two teams have to first pick which box you want! You all have about ten seconds to pick!", and with that the timer for all of them started and the teams begin to converse with eachother;
"This is so pointless", Jasmine said to her team, "Does it really matter which crate we pick?"
"It probably does", Mike answered with, "Chris probably has some twist in a certain box, which means I really don't know which one to pick!"
"I sense good auras in all of the boxes", Dawn then said to her team, "But I do sense much more goodness in the one on the right, much more than the one on the left anyway."
"Well then", Jasmine answered with, "I guess I'll just go for it and pick the one on the right then", she then turned to Chris and said, "We pick the one on the right!", and then Chris clapped his hands and the box opened. The box revealed a short brunette girl with a mole, a side ponytail hairdo, wearing a teal vest with badges over a pink shirt, and pants matching her vest along with white sneakers on her feet and big glasses over her hairs.
"Meet former contestant Beth!", and Beth smiled and waved at the team that had picked her. Of course, many of the Maggots had mixed feelings about having picked beth.
"She might not be the prettiest one of the girls", Dawn then said to her team, "But she has one of the most respectable auras of all the contestants.", meanwhile with the Rats, things were going differently.
"HA!", Sugar laughed, "There is no way we can lose! Just look at that ugly nerd the other team scored, the only thing missing to make this team real good is the Wizard!"
"Yeah", Scott then said, in reality being very unhappy with this turn of events, "We have this in the bag, alright.", he then looked to the remaining boxes, "I say we pick the one on the left. Who's with me?"
"It's the only idea we've had so far, so yeah", Topher then agreed with Scott, "I'm going with that one too."
"Fine", Sugar also replied with, "It's not like we can lose anyway with who the Maggots got!", and then the even laughed a bit, "Man this is gonna be as easy as eatin' Thanksgivin' Dinner!"
"Oh, I would not want to be so mean to Beth", Ella then said to the rest of her team, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder after all! And you should also remember the beautiful tale of the Ugly Duckling! Heheh."
"Shut your dang trap!", Sugar snapped at Ella with, "Nobody asked you what you thought!"
"Ooh!", Ella then covered her mouth in surprise, but then with a happy voice just said, "Sorry."
"Anyway", Sugar then said to Chris, "We take the one on the lef-"
"The middle one!", Scott then bluntly interrupted her with, "We take the one in the middle!"
"Are you surrrre about that?"
"Yes!", Scott replied with, "We're about it."
"Alrighty then!", and then Chris clapped his hands and the woman who was in the middle box was then revealed. The girl inside of it had orange/red hair, green eyes, wore a green skirt with matching green shoes, and a green top. Her hair was a bit curly, but long. It was in a very specific style. Of course, Chris wasted no time in introducing her as, "It's another former contestant, Izzy!", and of course Scott was not happy about it being a skinny and attractive girl at all.
Scott - "Augh, No! Not a hot girl! How am I supposed to sabotage my team during a modeling challenge now?! Ugh, and I was doing so well with my plan! By the way please don't take what I just said in the wrong way."
"So anyway", Chris then said to the remaining contestants as the last remaining crate was promptly ejected into the sky likely into the Hudson Bay, "I believe I should now explain the rest of the challenge! It's simple, really. Beth and Izzy will both be put onto individual go-karts driven by members of the opposing team. The selected drivers will drive deep into the woods and will have to make sure to NOT let the model's team catch the model! Of course, if the model is saved from the go-kart, they must then be brought back here where the team will be able to participate in Part Two of the challenge!"
"Um", Mike then questioned, "That doesn't sound very..."
"Safe?", Chris finished for him and then laughed, "Of course not! I was just gonna have you search in the woods for an animal, dress that animal up and then have that be the challenge, but this was so much more interesting! So....yeah. Teams you both get a few seconds to pick the Go-Kart drivers, and after that is all set and done the challenge will start IMMEDIATELY!", and of course focus then went immediately to the teams as they huddled up to decide who was going to be the designated Go-Kart driver:
"Alright", Topher then said to the rest of his team, "I say I do the driving?"
"What?!", Scott responded with, "Why you? I'm, um, well, I have experience!"
"And so do I!", Topher replied, "I'm the only on this team with the perfect poise and balance skills necessary to do the driving! Just, as long as I'm not the one driving the Kart with Izzy in it, I should be fine!"
"What makes you think you're the only one with balance and poise?!", Sugar snapped at Topher with, "I should have y'all know I'm a pageant queen, ya know. And pageants are all ABOUT that kinda stuff!"
"Yeah", Topher rolled his eyes, having a sarcastic tone of voice, "Totally convincing speech there."
"You know what, fine", Scott then said, "Toph can do the driving.", he of course folded his arms and wasn't happy about this at all, but he was going to deal with it. Meanwhile, focus went on the other team instead. They too, were huddling around and trying to come up with the best idea of who was going to drive the Go-Kart with the opposing team's model on it;
"Alright", Jasmine said to the Maggots, "We need someone who is going to be able to drive fast enough, and maybe even crazy enough, to not only put up with Izzy in the Go-Kart with them but also avoid the other team's attempts at snagging their model back. Any Volunteers?"
"Well", Shawn replied, "That kind of driving is easily learned when you're rushing away from the zombie horde."
"I could drive pretty well too", Mike then suggested to his team, "I mean, I don't know about putting up with Izzy, but I'm sure she's a pretty cool person so....yeah.....hehheh. Unless, you guys have better suggestions for the driver...heheh."
"Is that the only volunteers we have?", and of course none of the other team members replied at all, basically telling Jasmine that Shawn and Mike were indeed, the only choices they had for drivers. Aside from Jasmine herself, of course. "Really?"
"I'm sorry", Dawn said to her, "But I'm not very good at driving. I personally prefer walking."
"Yeah", Samey added in, still trying to sound like Amy, "I like someone to drive for me, it's too much work to do it for myself!"
"I don't know how to drive either", was all Cameron added in for himself.
"Well I'll take that as a yes"
"This is a problem", Cameron then pointed out, "We have to pick which one of Mike or Shawn is going to be the driver!"
"Ya know what", Mike then said to the team, "Shawn, you go ahead anyway. I just kinda thought about something, and yeah, you should be the driver....I think you'll make a way better driver then me! Heheh."
"Well, alright then", Shawn said with a shrug, "Just be sure no zom-"
"Trust me Shawn", Jasmine promptly interrupted with, "NO Zombies will be on the Go-Kart at all."
"ALRIGHT, CAMPERS!", Chris called out to all of them with, "Have the drivers finally been selected now, or do I need to extend the time even more?"
"We've decided Shawn will drive for our team!", Jasmine immediately announced to Chris with;
"And Topher", Scott also added for his own team, "Will go for us!"
"Alright then!", Chris replied with a smile on his face, "Then it's settled! Shawn will be driving for the Maggots, and Topher for the rats! If there are any objects to this, may they speak now, or forever hold their peace", and of course nobody objected at all to this, "Very well, on with the challenge!", and following that things went to when the challenge was actually going to happen. Shawn and Topher were in their respective Go Karts, both being painted in their respective team's colours. Izzy and Beth were seated in the passenger seats, Izzy smiling and Beth having a blank expression on her face. The other members of both teams are all on individual mopeds for reasons Chris was about to explain, "So yeah! The rescuers will be using mopeds to attempt in rescuing either Izzy or Beth, and if they do get the girl, they must bring her back to the stage here for the second part of the challenge! That part will be dressing up the girl in the best modeling outfit, and whichever team can make the girl look better than the other wins! But the other team wins by default if one can't get the girl to the stage on time. So, yeah! You guys ready to begin?"
"Hold right there", Jasmine then interrupted, "I have one single question."
"Ugh, fine, what is it?"
"Who was in the one box nobody wanted?"
"That is a very good question, actually", Cameron promptly added in;
"Heheh, yeah!", Chris then laughed a bit, "It is very funny you ask that, Jasmine."
[FOCUS GOES OVER TO THE HUDSON BAY]
*In the Hudson bay, there is the third crate, the one that nobody had taken for the challenge. There is a single seagull sitting ontop of the crate, and a flock of seagulls in the water surrounding it. Soon enough, the box has a noise coming from it. The sound of a sassy black girl named LeShawna to be exact*
LeShawna - *She's inside the box so she is technically unseen* "YO! CHRIS! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!" *All she gets in response is seagulls squawking. One even flies onto the crate, poops on it, and then just flies off* "Oh, when I get outta here you' gon pay, McLean! YOU GON' PAY FO THIS! You betta hope I don't get outta this crate, for if there is no hell, LeShawna's gon' make one just for your evil ass! YA HEARD ME, CHRIS?!"
[FOCUS GOES BACK TO THE CURRENT SEASON'S CHALLENGE, ISLAND AND CONTESTANTS]
"Anyway", Chris said as focus was back on the current island and challenge, "We should get started with the challenge now. Since I've already explained every possible way of how this challenge works, I believe it's now time for us to begin, SO", and then Chris took out an airhorn, and with the horn, he blew it, "LET THE GAMES BEGIN!", and with those words the challenge officially began. It was almost instantly that all of the remaining contestants began moving in their respective vehicles, the two Go Kart drivers started first obviously, while those on the mopeds were not very far after. Infact, Ella and Dawn were both joined on their mopeds by their Dorahts. Of course, neither one minded this at all. Focus went on to Shawn's ride first, with Izzy in the Go Kart with him;
"Weeeeeee!", Izzy cheered ever happily, "This is fun! I wonder what all these buttons do!"
"DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING!", Shawn exclaimed back to her, "You never know if something will infect you with the Z Virus!"
"The Z Virus?", Izzy questioned, "Is that the virus that turns you into a zombie?"
"Yes! What else would it be called?!"
"Cooool! If that's what they do then I'm definitely pressing buttons!"
"What?! WHY?! WHY WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE A ZOMBIE?!"
"Because it'd be cool!", and of course as she said that, Shawn began freaking out. Izzy was pressing and moving every single possible thing she could, and as such;
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!", came from both of their mouths, Shawn out of fear that Izzy was causing so much chaos already, and Izzy out of having fun with this whole situation. As their Go Kart went all over the place, running right over several rocks, almost wrecking into numerous trees, straight up running over the mutated squirrel (But the squirrel did live), and even straight through a bear cave, focus went over to the mopeds chasing after them.
"Man!", Sugar groaned, "How on earth are we supposed to catch 'em now?!"
"I don't know", Scott replied, in a clearly fake tone of voice, pretending to be worried, "I think it's hopeless to even try at this point."
"Oh, I know it seems that way", Ella said to Scott and Sugar, "But if we try, I know we can succeed!"
"Oh just shut it!", Sugar instantly responded to her with, "Nobody asked you!"
"I say we just go back and wait for Izzy to show up, then kick Shawn out of the Go Kart when he shows up", Scott then suggested to Ella and Sugar;
"Now THAT is a plan!", Sugar said with a smile, "Let's do that!", and as the three then drove on their mopeds back to the original site, Scott had a very evil, scheming grin on his face. His plan, was now working. While Scott was enjoying the fact his plan was working, or that he thought it was at least, focus shifted over to the other team, more specifically on Topher and Beth as they too were driving/riding in a Go Kart with members of the Maggots chasing after them on simple mopeds. However, they were driving more casually, and Topher was trying to have some small talk with Beth;
"So", Topher began with, "Do you think the people back home will think I'd make a good host?"
"How should I know?", Beth responded with, "I don't really know you at all."
"Well you will soon enough", Topher said with a slight laugh, "Man will you know my name!"
"Um, shouldn't you be focusing on the people trying to catch me away from you?"
"Relax", Topher assured her, "I got this challenge in the bag! There's no way my team will loose!"
"Well, while we wait, you wanna play cards or something?"
"Nah", Topher answered with, "I gotta keep my eyes on the path, ya know."
"You know, maybe you'd win better if you focused on the fact the only goal is to keep away from the other team."
"Relax!", Topher answered with confidence, "I can't even see them in the rear view mirror, I'm fine! And OOOH!", he then suddenly saw that out of nowhere there was a fast food restaurant, "A place to eat!"
"Um.........what?", Beth was just confused, shocked and confused;
"Welcome to the Hispani-Burger how may I take your order?", was what the voice from the electronic speaker said when Topher and Beth drove up to the menu sign, most of it was themed very oddly, it had a nazi sign on the speaker, various KKK (people in white cloaks with pointed hats) people on one side with scared Hispanic people on the other, and in the center of this artwork were the food, Beth was just, well, scared. Though the KKK people did appear to have lizard-like feet and lizard-like tails;
"I don't think-"
"I'm taking our order!", Topher said, then turning to the menu, "Um yeah I'll take a salad with some water, gotta make sure I take care of my bod, and-", he then turned to Beth, "You want anything."
"No, no, I'm good, I'm good."
"Well then yeah, that's all."
"What would you like on the salad?", the voice then asked;
"Well the usual, ya know, eggs, lettuce, carrots, those little cheese bits, um, that purple stuff, some of that meat you put on salads, and uh, yeah, those small tomatoes or whatever they are, and sprinkle it with dressing."
"Coming right up sir, just go to the window", and in response to that Topher indeed drove to the window, where Beth was even more scared. She saw, in the window, a reptilian being. That's right, a lizard person. Standing upright, but a reptile. The lizard had the same facial features as a Dilophosaurus, the notch on the top jaw, the double crests on the top of the head, only this thing was standing upright and wearing a uniform to show he was working here. This mutant dinosaur was a teenager, spoke in a cracking voice that was just going through puberty, and said;
"Here's your order sir", as he handed Topher his salad and water, "Thank you for choosing Hispani-Burger, giving fine lizard people like us the money we need to continue our jobs and not be replaced by those dang hispanics."
"You're welcome, and as for money, well, I'll be host of this show pretty soon one day so...yeah", and then Topher just drove off and laughed. The lizard boy just remained silent, before sighing and going back to his job. While driving away, Topher was then eating his salad with a now confused and still somewhat scared Beth sitting right next to him, and soon enough, Topher realized, "I think that restaurant is operated by racists."
"What gave you that idea?", was Beth's sarcastic remark to that as focus then shifted to the rest of the Maggots team (Jasmine, Cameron, Mike, Samey pretending to be Amy and Dawn) who were chasing after Topher and Beth on mopeds. Dawn had her two Dorahts with her sitting in the front basket of her moped, and of course, all of them were looking for the Go Kart with Topher and Beth in it.
"Aw man!", Mike then complained, "We're never gonna catch up to them now!"
"Don't worry now", Jasmine said to her team, "We haven't lost yet! We just have to keep following the Go Kart's tracks and catch up to them."
"I think I have a better idea than that", Cameron then suggested, "We could perhaps use the tracks to plan a shortcut for ourselves, perhaps whenever they make a turn, we go off the track to follow that turn so that we like, take a shortcut!"
"Well, not the best idea", Jasmine commented, "But it will get us there slightly faster, so I say we go with it!"
"Wait, I just thought of something", Samey then added in, "What if some of the mutant creatures get in our way?!"
"Then we'll just have to ignore 'em", Jasmine said to her, "We just gotta ride past them and focus on the Go Kart! Does everyone understand?"
"Yeah", the rest of the team replied in unison with;
"Alright, then let's go!", and Jasmine began leading the team, using Cameron's idea of trying to make amateur shortcuts using the turns Topher and Beth made along the path.
Cameron - "I know my plan was not the most original or the best one ever come up, but it was all I had! I just hope it doesn't cause the team to lose or anything. I don't think it will do that."
Following that, focus went over to the other team, more specifically, that meant it went to Scott, Ella and Sugar back at the modeling stage just waiting for Scott's plan to come into action. Ella was sitting on the stage with her Doraht in her lap, and was petting it while humming happily. Sugar was just making sure her hair looked alright ,and Scott was just leaning on a tree waiting for his team to end up losing. Chris however, soon walked up to all of them, and was curious;
"Uh, why are you guys just waiting here?"
"Because!", Sugar replied, "It's all part of our plan!"
"Yeah!", Sugar replied, "We're gonna jump the other team's Go Kart when they get here! It's really smart, I know, I'm the one who came up with it, after all."
"No you weren't!", Scott then immediately argued back, "I was!"
"Well I was first to copyright it!", Sugar replied, "Whatever that word means. I just know it has somethin' to do with the law."
"Ugh, fine, whatever.", Scott rolled his eyes, "Fine, she was the one who came up with it.", and then he muttered to himself, "Not really."
"I see", Chris said in response to them, "Well in that case, I see no real reason why you guys can't continue on doing what you're doing so, yeah! Go ahead! Knock yourselves out!", and then Chris walked away. Scott just snickered and laughed, and Sugar smiled a wicked grin herself, looking wickedly at Ella;
Sugar - "Oh I know that this'll make the team fail and all, trust me, I do, but no way am I spending one more night on this island with ELLA!"
Following that, focus again went over to the other team, as in the members of the Maggots that were driving mopeds to chase after Topher and Beth. They still had no sign of Topher and Beth in their sight at all, Dawn still had the Dorahts in a basket on the front of her moped, and all of them were growing gradually bored with this challenge. Mike however, was the first to speak up;
"Is anyone else getting bored with this?"
"Yes", all of his other team members said that in unison.
"Cameron", Jasmine said to the small black nerd, "Your plan isn't working! You sure you don't have any other plans?"
"Well actually", Cameron then pondered over to what to say as his answer, until finally, "Um....actually......not really......I really don't."
"C'mon, buddy!", Mike said to him, "I know you can think of something!"
"I really can't!", Cameron said back, "I can't make any calculations right now, so I'm not very, well, able to think about what to do."
"Well then", Jasmine replied with, "Guess we'll just have to chase after them then."
"Look!", Samey, pretending to be Amy, pointed out ahead of herself, "There they are! We're catching up to them!"
"Well then, let's kick it into full gear on these things!", and with that order from Jasmine, all of the team went as fast as they could on their mopeds to catch up to Topher and Beth who they just know had spotted. Topher and Beth on the other hand, well, more specifically Topher, were/was just enjoying driving at an average speed, completly confident the other team was not going to catch up to him anytime soon. Of course, that changed, Beth pointed out;
"They're catching up to you!"
"Huh?", Topher replied, "Oh, no way! We passed them a long while ago, Beth! No way they're catching up now!"
"Yes they are!", Beth replied, "If you want your team to win, I'd suggest you speed up now!"
"Fine, fine!", Topher responded, "I'll speed up.", and then, literally just before the Maggots rammed into his Go Kart, he hit the gas and sped right into full speed, effectively starting a chase sequence since the Maggots were not about to just give up on their victory. While that was all going on, focus shifted finally, back over to Izzy and Shawn. Somehow, they were going up the cliff. That's right, up the cliff. Shawn wasn't even driving anymore, Izzy was the one at the wheel now, with a terrified Shawn hanging off the back end of the Go Kart;
"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!", was Izzy's scream of joy, while;
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!", was Shawn's scream of terror as Izzy drove the Go Kart, and him dangling off the rear end of it, literally up the cliff. This in turn meant that they flew up into the air, then back down so that they could go down the slope of the cliff. Shawn held this scream of absolute terror especially while they were riding down this slope. On their way down, they ran over a squirrel, the mutant mouse, the eagle trying to eat the mutant mouse, a mutated bear, an entire flock of mutant seagulls, a mutated rattlesnake with wings, four more Dorahts, tore straight through the racist fast food restaraunt and somehow ran over every single mutant lizard person customer and employee in the place including the manager, somehow caused the fast food place to explode for no real reason, and eventually rammed right into Topher and Beth's Go Karts. This ramming caused the Go Kart to explode and send Shawn, Topher, Izzy and Beth all flying into the air;
"OH MY GOD!", was what Topher, Beth and Shawn all shouted as they flew into the air, and then Shawn and Topher screamed (Beth is unable to scream), "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!", as all of them began plummetting for the ground, Izzy on the other hand, just went into a cannonball formation and said;
"Weeeee! CANNONBALL!", and grinned as she along with the other three plumetted for the ground they could hardly see. All the while, the Maggot Team was just sitting on their mopeds in shock of what they had just seen.
"So", Mike began after what was a total minute of silence, "What do we do now?", and focus then promptly shifted right back on over to the stage where Scott, Sugar and Ella along with her Doraht were all waiting for the chance to put their plan into action. Sugar was filing her nails, Ella was petting and humming to her Doraht, and Scott was just tossing a rock into the air while sitting on the edge of the stage. Chris was sitting on a lounge chair sipping coffee. Of course, all of them were silent, just simply minding their own business. That is, until Izzy, Topher, Beth and Shawn dropped down onto all of them. Beth landed right ontop of Ella and her Doraht, causing both of them to fall off of the stage and on to the ground. Topher fell onto Scott, who in turn then rolled down a nearby hill towards what was a rock.
"Ow!", was Scott's response to slamming into said rock. Shawn fell right onto a piece of rope, his weight causing said piece of rope to then snap. This snapping trigged a chain reaction of a rather overly complex trap. The rope flew right onto a device that lit up a hot air balloon. This balloon flew up into the air with a box until it reached a point where the rope slid back into it and popped it. The crate it was holding then had a marble fire from it, this marble landed directly onto a tiny pipe made of tree bark where it slid through loops, twists and turns to get to a miniature seesaw. When it landed on this seesaw, it made the other end go up and hit a wooden crane system. The crane turned and hit a bathtub. This bathtub then fell from it's perch and landed on a giant switch that in turn caused a fire to ingnite along a wire on the ground. The little spark went along the ground and up the intercom pole until it reached a firecracker that flew right off the top of the intercom poll and struck a cage dangling from the tree. The cage, fell onto Scott. "What the?!", Scott said once the cage had fallen on him, "Why am I suddenly in a cage?!", and then he noticed Fang, with the classic grin on his face, looking right at him from behind the cage. Scott gasped, "AAAAAH! GET ME OUTTA HERE!", but of course, Chris ignored his cries for help with;
"Nah, you see, I like seeing people like you suffer like that", he said as he sipped more champagne from a glass he was holding, "Infact, I don't just like it, I LOOOOOOVE it!", but then;
"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!", and Izzy fell right ontop of Chris. Not with just a thud though. She fell so hard onto him that there was a thud, a hole in the ground, and also a cracking sound.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!", and that sound did not come from Izzy. No, it came from Chris. Everyone, even the other members of the Maggots as they arrived on their mopeds, and even Fang who was trying to drag the cage with Scott in it away, and even the Dorahts, were shocked when they heard that blood curdling scream.
"Izzy?", Topher questioned, "You alright in there?", but then Izzy jumped out of the hole with a backflip and safely landed on the ground infront of the hole;
"Yep!", Izzy replied, "Infact, i'm even better than I am before! I've been having these weird back problems ever since the third season ended, and landing on Chris just fixed them!", she then stretched with her hands on her back a bit, "Yep, never felt better!"
"WHAT ABOUT ME?!", Chris then cried out from the hole, "YOU JUST LANDED ON ME YOU WACKO NUTJOB! YOU LANDED ON ME! CHRIS MCLEAN! THE HOST OF TOTAL DRAMA! THE GREATEST MAN TO EVER BE BORN! THE GREATEST TELEVISION HOST TO EVER EXIST! YOU CAUSED SOMETHING ON ME TO CRACK! YOU, YOU, YOU'LL NEVER BE A CONTESTANT ON THIS SHOW AGAIN! EVER! I OFFICIALLY BAN YOU FROM BEING A CONTESTANT."
"Um, I don't think you can do that", Izzy then bluntly said to him, "After eavesdropping on Courtney a few times I have it memorized that only the PRODUCERS can officially ban someone from being a contestant period. And last time I checked, one of the producers happens to hate you and probably wants your job too."
"JUST, JUST, JUST GO TO HELL!", was all Chris said in response to that, "AH, AH, THE PAIN. I CAN'T GET GET UP! I CAN'T EVEN GET UP!", and it was then that all of the remaining new contestants looked into the hole, and all of them were shocked at what they saw. Chris, THE Chris McLean, was permanently injured. That's right, permanently. The reason, was because the injuries were severe. His left leg was completely twisted 180 degrees in the opposite direction, and his leff hand was so bent and crooked there was no way he'd ever use it again. Not only that, but there were likely other injuries that one could not see plainly.
"Oh my goodness!", Ella exclaimed, "You poor, poor man!"
"SOMEONE GET THE INTERNS ALREADY!", Chris replied, "INTERNS!", he then called out, "I NEED YOU! INTERNS! GET OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!"
"Is there anything we can do to help?", Ella then asked, but Chris yelled back;
"NO! HELL NO! I AM NOT BEING HELPED BY CONTESTANTS! I HAVE AN IMAGE I NEED TO KEEP UP! FIRST I'VE GOT TO ASSESS MY INJURIES AT THE HOSPITAL, THEN I'VE GOT TO GET MY HAIR AND FACE FIXED UP AGAIN, AND THEN I'VE GOT TO GET MY CHARM BACK READY FOR THE NEXT EPISODE OR THE CEREMONY!"
"Well", Jasmine then said, "Maybe if you stop screaming and ask nice-"
"OH JUST SHUT UP!"
"LOOK", Jasmine then sternly replied, "You do know, we COULD just dig this hole in and leave you buried under six feet of dirt right now instead of just leaving you for the interns to help out later."
"Or", Shawn then suggested, "We could leave him here so the mutant creatures could devour him alive."
"Or that", Jasmine continued, "But perhaps if you stop screaming and say what team is the winner, we'll go get the interns FOR you."
"Fine!", Chris then said with a long sigh, "I'll name the freakin' winner. The Toxic Rats!"
"YES!", and the Toxic Rats all cheered, except Scott who was still in a cage.
"What?!", Jasmine exclaimed, "Why not us? Izzy was their model!"
"BECAUSE", Chris sternly replied, "Izzy was being driven by SHAWN, who is a member of YOUR team. If she had been in the OTHER Go Kart driven by Topher, THIS would NOT have happened to me."
"Heheh", and Topher just folded his arms and made a very smug smile;
"Now", Chris replied. "Someone PLEASE go get Chef or the Interns, and for the LOVE OF GOD do NOT get Veronica or any one of the producers! I am not letting HER or THEM see me in this condition! And if you even think about getting Cassandra, I'll have your entire team automatically eliminated from the game!"
"Okay okay, we're getting the Interns", Samey replied in an annoyed tone as she and her team left to get interns to help Chris, "Hold your dang horses!", while the Maggots focused on getting Chris the interns as she asked, the Rats were focused on cheering for their victory. All of course, except for Scott. Scott just sat in the cage he was trapped in, folded his arms, and angrily scowled at his team;
Scott - "Stupid freakin' team! We were supposed to LOSE! Not WIN! Ugh, I must have jinxed myself or something because this does not make ANY sense to me AT ALL! We didn't even get to do the part two of the challenge anyway! What kind of rip off is this?!"
Samey - "Well, I just hope I'm not the one who gets kicked off."
Cameron - "I really wish I could have helped out today. I guess I've been too focused on examining Mike to really think of a way to win the challenge for the team. I wouldn't be surprised if I am voted off. After all, I don't really have any major bully picking on me so they won't feel any need to sympathize with me being kicked off, and plus, I was the one who wasn't able to really think of a plan.............I'm done for."
Announcer - "HEY YOU FREAKIN' KIDS, YOU WANT EXTREME ACTION?! YOU WANT EXTREME ACTION?! WELL, FIRST OFF DESTROY ALL YOUR STUPID AND LAME BUGS BUNNY MERCHANDISE BECAUSE WARNER BROS. IS MAKING A NEW BUNNY! THAT'S RIGHT, A NEW, FREAKIN' BUNNY! A NEW FREAKIN' BUNNY! INTRODUCING AWESOME BUNNY! AWESOME BUNNY MAKES BUGS BUNNY LOOK LIKE BUGS PUSSY! THAT'S RIGHT, YEAH! AWESOME SHOOTS LAZERS OUT OF HIS CROTCH! AWESOME CAN SMOKE WHATEVER DRUG HE WANTS AND GET AWAY WITH IT! AWESOME HAS NITROS ON ALL OF HIS CARS! AWESOME KILLED HIS LANDLORD TO AVOID PAYING RENT! AWESOME SINGLE HANDEDLY TOOK DOWN ISIS! AWESOME-"
*This Commercial has been cut off because the orgin of the broadcast, located in Syria, has suddenly gone offline*
"ATTENTION MUTANT MAGGOTS!", Chris then said over the intercom system, sometime long after the interns had pulled him out of the pit where he was injured in, "Please report to the campfire pit immediately to see which one of you will be the next unfortunate victim to leave!"; Some more time after that, at night time as the moon was high in the sky, the campfire was lit up, and as Chris was now seated in a wheelchair with the plate of marshmallows on his lap and Chef with the toxic marshmallow in a box standing right beside him. The Maggots have also by then made it up to the campfire pit, sitting on various random stumps around the fire. All the while Chris was standing, well, sitting, right infront of them, holding a plate of normal marshmallows in his lap while Chef held the box with the toxic marshmallow in his hands.
"Maggots," Chris began, shaking his head, "What happened to you? You were doing so well. I mean, you got rid of SAMMY! That should have been enough for you guys to bounce back and win, but I guess all you could do was suck today." The Maggots all glared at Chris for that. "You know the drill. When I call your name, you will claim a marshmallow. The loser however gets the Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom, blah blah blah, you guys just went through this. Chef, if you will..." Chef then held up the box that contained the Toxic Marshmallow. "The following people are safe: Jasmine, Shawn, Amy, and Mike! Take your marshmallows," Chris said as he threw them their marshmallows. Dawn and Cameron were both without a marshmallow, and while Cameron looked ready to piss his pants, Dawn's face was oddly calm and collected. "You two are in our bottom two. Let's look at why people would want you gone. Cameron, you haven't done much in the way of physical challenges. Actually, you haven't done much at all. You're kind of dead weight dude."
"I've lived in a bubble all my life! What did you expect?!", Cameron countered. Chris ignored him and continued.
"Dawn, you seemed more concerned with the Dohrats, whatever they are, over the challenge. Do you have anything to say to that?"
"I did what I thought was best," Dawn replied. "If we do not deal with them now, they will be a major cause of problems later on down the road."
"Whatever," Chris said. "In the end, one of you got six votes while the other only got one. The Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom goes to..............." He took a moment to revel in the pause he created, and he took even more pleasure in Cameron's face.
"Cameron!" Chef then threw the Toxic Marshmallow at Cameron, who jumped up from the stump and ran from it quickly.
"I guess I can't blame you guys for voting for me," Cameron said. "I'd vote for me if I were in your position. I'll say that this was a fun experience, and I think I know how the real world works a little more as well."
"Enough with the sappy talk, let's get ON with this!", Chris complained, ready to launch Cameron. Cameron was then in the catapult, with only Mike walking up and saying goodbye to him.
"Bye Cam," Mike said to Cameron with a friendly smile, "We'll miss you. Sorry things went the way they did."
"It's okay, I learned a lot while I was here,", Cameron waved back to Mike. "Also, I know you have MPD, or should I call it DID?"
"Wait, how did you find out?!" Mike yelped, scared with this information.
"I've read a lot of psychology books, but don't worry. I won't tell anyOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEE!!", Cameron yelled as he flew away, soaring far past the horizon. It seems his light weight caused him to go farther than Chris anticipated.
"Huh, probably should have made some calculations based on his weight... Nah!" Chris spoke, and then turned to the camera with a smile on his face, "So! It seems that loser light weight nerd was the one who flew the coop this time! Who will leave the nest next? What ARE the Dorahts and why are they so attached to Dawn and Ella specifically? Who will NOT leave next time? Find out all these answers and MORE, on TOTAL, DRAMA, REVENGE OF THE ISLAND!", and with that, the episode faded out to the credits so those still on the island could get back to focusing on the upcoming episode;
[CAMERON'S HURL OF SHAME CLIP]
*The camera focuses on a house somewhere in Nunavut, Canada. More specifically, the community of Apex not too far from Iqualit. Due to this being on Baffin Island, this little mostly inuit town was covered with and surrounded by complete arctic ice cap. It's your average suburban home, then Cameron comes flying towards it*
Cameron - "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" *He crashes head first into the roof, and finds himself in a completely pink room* "Huh?" *He sees the room he's in* "I'm, I'm alive?! I'm, I'm", *he sees nothing but My Little Pony posters, dolls, figures and decorations in the room* "I'm in a little girl's bedroom. Well, it could be worse." *Then suddenly someone opens the door. It's a boy. A preteen boy. The boy has darkly tanned skin, a cute face,and oddly purple hair, but it was short purple hair. He also has black eyes, wears a yellow shirt with blue jean pants and green sneakers. He also had braces.*
Teenage Boy - "MOM! THIS BOY JUST CRASHED INTO MY ROOM!"
Cameron - "This is.....your room?"
The Boy's Mom - "What?!" *The woman walks in, it's Sierra's mother, Margery. Still looking the same, mint cardigan sweater, classic mom jeans, simple mint coloured shoes, shoulder length brown hair, and black eyes* "Oh my! SIERRA, GET IN HERE!" *Cameron immediately realizes who's house this is and makes a break for the window, but it's too late*
Sierra - *Her voice only, for now the camera focuses on the view from outside her brother's window, with Cameron desperately trying to escape* "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHH!" *Her hands are shown immediately grabbing onto him, dragging him out of a view*
Cameron - *He raises up a single sign saying 'HELP ME'*
[HURL OF SHAME CLIP ENDS]